Aries ♈︎

Plot twist: Saturday’s serving “Housewives reunion but everyone’s got an earpiece, ” thanks to the Sun’s Sagittarius debut crashing Mercury retrograde in Scorpio’s hissy fit. If you thought Marjorie Taylor Greene’s resignation was the week’s most dramatic exit, honey, wait till you ghost your own group chat before brunch. Uranus in Taurus, retrograde and pressed, is throwing shade at the Sun like it just caught its partner texting their ex—who, by the way, is always Mercury. Venus in Scorpio is giving “revenge glam” but with receipts. Meanwhile, the waxing crescent Moon is that TikTok microtrend: full of potential, a little unhinged, and seconds away from going viral or getting canceled. If Saturn in Pisces has taught you anything, it’s that showing up vulnerable is braver than any performative hot take. So when the Supreme Court keeps redistricting drama on the front page, tell the universe: “I refuse to play by these maps—I’m drawing my own.” Screenshot it, because today is about owning your chaos with a side of sincerity.