Aries ♈︎

Who needs caffeine when Venus, Saturn, AND Neptune are having a kiki in your sign? It’s like the Met Gala afterparty and you are the controversial centerpiece (think: Jared Leto as the cat). While the world spirals about new supreme leaders and oil prices shooting up faster than your resting heart rate, you’re channeling your own “Supreme” energy. The Moon opposite Uranus stirs up ancestral drama (think Real Housewives of Persepolis), so don’t be shocked if you get dragged into someone’s plot twist by lunchtime. Mercury retrograde is serving “accidentally hit reply-all” chaos, so proofread those emails before your hot take on Bruno Mars’ album leaks to your boss. The waning gibbous Moon demands you declutter emotional closets: what ex, grudge, or ugly shoe are you still keeping for Nostalgia™? Today’s vibe: protest chic, like a drag queen lip-syncing “I-Feel-Like-I’m-Fixin’-to-Die Rag” with rhinestone war paint. You’re the revolution, darling, but pack snacks.