Who leaked the group chat? (Spoiler: It might be you.)
Mercury’s hosting a Monday morning press conference and, honey, every planet RSVP’d with follow-up questions. Sun, Venus, Mars? They’re networking in Capricorn like it’s a LinkedIn fever dream—everyone’s “synergy, ” nobody’s honest. The Moon in Scorpio wants leaks and DMs, like a journalist at the Golden Globes afterparty with three burner phones. Meanwhile, that Jupiter retrograde is giving “old tweets resurfacing”—is nostalgia cute or just messy? Fed Chair Powell’s under federal investigation, and honestly, you’d be THRIVING as the whistleblower with the best shoes. Your tongue is sharp, but your heart’s in the group chat. Monday’s drama: will you spill, or will you plot in the drafts? Screenshot your best one-liner before it goes viral. “You’re not messy, you’re meta.”
That was the vibe check.
The Drip fits every Gemini. The Oracle is couture: your exact chart, down to the minute.
